Yes! I have a broken heart and as a result I’ve lost a few pounds…
I don’t recommend it…but apparently for some of us a breakup can cause weight loss. Sorry I’m not going to share all of the sad details of my breakup with you. If that’s what you were hoping for you might as well stop reading now.
This blog is about my fitbattle…NOT love, dating, etc. What I will tell you is that I’ve been dating someone for a little over four months and the relationship ended last week. We hit a rough patch earlier in the week and officially stopped seeing each other as of Thursday night. I am very sad and feeling a bit lost…to say the least. Intellectually I know that I will be okay but it really doesn’t feel that way right now.
Life events often impact our fitbattle. “What (you ask) is the status of my fitbattle as a result of the breakup?” Well at the onset I lost my appetite. This is not a usual response for me when faced with difficulties.
When I woke up this morning my appetite was still lost. I’ve had to really focus to ensure I’m getting enough calories, protein, etc. Several days last week I did not eat enough…eating was the last thing on my mind.
I suppose a little good news…tonight I was out with my friend Sheila and I was tempted by the chocolate molten lava cake. Yep we ordered and devoured it. Not a craving I want to have too often but I’m taking it as a glimmer of hope.
My lost appetite has resulted in a two to three pound weight loss so far. Not the best way to lose weight. Chris (my personal trainer) doesn’t think I’ll sustain this weight loss. Only time will tell. Let me be clear… I DO NOT suggest a broken heart as a tactic to lose those unwanted pounds.
Another challenge has been making sure I get my workouts in. Thankfully…even when I’m on autopilot, which is how I feel right now, my mind gets me to the gym (or Bikram yoga which I started last Sunday thanks to a Groupon…but that’s another blog).
Yesterday morning, although I got to the gym and on the treadmill, at about 9 minutes in I found myself wanting to quit and leave the gym. This was a little surprising since usually the hardest part of the fitbattle is getting to the gym, not staying at the gym. I did talk myself down and finished what I started. This broken heart stuff is awful! So many ups and downs.
I know some of you are feeling oh so sad for me right now and you just want me to feel better. Please do not take this the wrong way… but I’ve not experienced much comfort hearing (the typical cliches we rely on in these circumstances)… “you’ll be okay”, “there are plenty of fish in the sea”, “it gets easier every day”, “blah, blah, blah.”
I know all of this but my heart hurts and unfortunately there’s not much that can be said that would make me feel better. I just need time… time to heal… time to reflect… and time to fight my own way back to me.
If you want to express your concern or empathy please offer up a little pray for me that my heart will heal and while you are at it please say a pray for the guy I lost too. He’s a good man and I miss him.
p.s. thank you to my friends and family that have been supporting me as I’ve started the healing process. I really, really, really appreciate your time and patience, your support without judgement, and your encouragement.